


postmortem

by saltyvenus



Category: American Horror Story, American Horror Story: Coven
Genre: Dark, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-03
Updated: 2018-11-22
Packaged: 2019-08-17 02:52:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,401
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16507979
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/saltyvenus/pseuds/saltyvenus
Summary: for two people who were so isolated from the world, albeit in such very different ways, it must’ve been a miracle. they needed the friendship they gave each other before one of them slips away.





	1. chapter one

zoe had learnt about salem and witches way back in middle school, how they were suspected and killed, how they fled, their immense powers and force. in the past, it wasn’t that important to her. looking back on it now, she should’ve paid more attention, because they weren’t just ugly green women with broomsticks. and now that she _was_ one, the pit in her stomach that she had been feeling ever since she killed her boyfriend that one afternoon increased. it just didn’t feel fair, or right.

zoe was greeted with welcome arms, for the most part. the academy wasn’t _as_ horrible as she expected it to be, it was just...different. and small, very small. she definitely expected more people. most of the girls were nice though, and so was the headmistress, so that was all that really mattered. at one point, zoe had wished for a normal life, but now, it wasn’t so bad.

* * *

zoe wakes up in a cold sweat, her heart racing as the adrenaline pumps through her body. her head hurts, a lot, and her vision is blurry as she tries to adjust to the darkness that is her room. blindly, she turns on her nightlight, rubbing her eyes at the sudden brightness. her hands make their way down to her throat. it was raw, it hurted. zoe swings out of bed and leaves, tip toeing downstairs to get a drink to sooth her aching throat. she gets there pretty smoothly, not making any noise to wake up the rest of the house, but it’s dark downstairs and she doesn’t feel like turning on the lights because she doesn’t want to attract attention.

 zoe squints, trying to find the fridge. she blindly uses her hands to touch around the kitchen in search for it.

seconds later, the lights flick on, and she stands still like a deer in the headlights.

“it’s like, two am. why are you awake?”

 zoe lets out the breath she was holding in. she was so scared to think it was cordelia or fiona, when it was only just her fellow witch and roommate, madison.

 “i-i... was thirsty.” zoe says with her back to the other girl, hands on the counter. “i woke up so suddenly, a-and my head feels like shit, my throat hurts..”

 “that’s normal.” madison says. “cause you’re getting used to your powers.” zoe hears the blonde’s voice getting closer.

 zoe turns around to face her. the lights are dim, but she can see she’s wearing a long and old t-shirt, with probably only her underwear below. her green eyes have deep and dark circles underneath them like they usually do, and in which zoe was always too afraid to ask about, while her face and body is unusual pale which makes zoe think if she rarely ever gets sleep. she’d only been here a week, and didn’t know much about the other residents of the coven, but there was something about madison and the way she acted which made zoe feel...she didn’t even know the word for it. “things”, i guess.

 “why’d you follow me?” zoe asks, staring into her bright eyes. “is there something you want to tell me?”

“nothing in particular.” the blonde smiles slightly, but it doesn’t look genuine or real. it’s like there are strings attached to the ends of her mouth, and someone is lifting them up at the wrong time. zoe knows how to read people, and she can see right through madison. she doesn’t say anything though, in order not to upset the other girl, but it is something she’ll keep in the back of her head to bring up at the right time.  

“okay.” zoe whispers, turning back around to open the fridge. she grabs the first bottle of water that she sees. “then you should go back to sleep. i’ll come soon.” zoe gulps the water down quickly, the cold liquid matching with her raw throat was painful but satisfying. she finishes the entire bottle in a few seconds, and turns around to see if her blonde friend is still there. she isn’t, unfortunatly, and zoe feels slightly upset, but she’s glad madison actually listened.

a bright, white light that flashes along the house almost makes zoe drop her empty water bottle. seconds later, she hears the sound of rain dropping on the roof and alongside the windows of the kitchen, thunder accompanying it as well. zoe decides this as her cue to go back to her room.

going upstairs as quietly as she did going down, but this time the stormy weather helped cover up the sounds of the old, creaking staircase that would make a noise anytime she even _slightly_ stepped on it.

zoe does get to her room eventually, she shuts the door behind her slowly. another flicker of white light flashes through the room, thunder rumbling shortly after. in the dark, zoe can barely see madison squirming in her bed. maybe she got scared.

zoe slides into her bed, pulling the covers up halfway. she stares up at the ceiling, looking at the bad paint job while the rain outside only gets heavier, she still can’t sleep. and it looks like she wasn’t the only one. zoe can hear madison’s sighs from across the room, and she can hear her moving around uncomfortably.

“madison?” zoe says. she knows the other girl is just as awake as she is, but zoe get doesn’t get a response. “hey, are you okay?” she thinks that maybe this time, she’ll get an answer. zoe sits without one for a while, and she’s about to go to sleep when madison finally replies.

“i don’t like the thunder..” she mumbles, and zoe can barely make out what she’s saying because the rain is so heavy. “i know it’s childish, but, i just...really hate it.”

zoe sits up so she can see her from across the room. there’s a bunch of blankets and pillows in the shape of madison, and she must’ve heard zoe get up because shortly after, she did the same thing. even though it’s dark, they meet each other’s eyes.

zoe pats the space next to her unsurely, scared to ask her question as if madison would throw a fit. she’s only known her for short time, zoe doesn’t know how she reacts to things. she lies back down, looking up at the ceiling again.

“do you want to…” zoe doesn’t even know if she has the power to finish the sentence, she just sorta hopes madison knows what she’s asking for so she doesn’t have to _actually_ say it.

zoe hears her moving around in the dark, and soon after, she feels a dip in the bed. the brunette turns to look at her, half expecting madison to have already fallen asleep. but her bright green eyes, illuminated by the string of moonlight peeking out from the blinds, stare right back at her. she plays with the bottom of zoe’s shirt, before the brunette coldly turns the other way.

madison presses up against zoe’s back, chin resting on her shoulder, hands moving around her front, though she brings one up to tuck a strand of straight brown hair behind zoe’s ear.

“are you mad?” she whispers. her mouth being so close to the other girl’s ear, it gave her shivers. “do you want me to leave?”

zoe feels nervous under madison’s touch. it was a weird sensation, and something she couldn’t explain.

“no. don’t leave.”

madison responds by gripping zoe tightly, like she was going to leave her if she let go. afraid of abandonment ever since her parents did the same thing, but madison tried to never let it show, maybe only subtly when she was in dire need of confrontation, which, in the end, she never got because no one’s ever cared enough about her.

madison hides her face in zoe’s shoulder, slowly falling asleep, and she hopes the other girl does it too.


	2. chapter two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> trigger warning : self harm, ect..

the space next to her is cold, and zoe knows madison has been gone for a while. she slowly sits up, rubbing her temples as she tried to push back the ongoing headache she felt coming. looking around the room, she remembers it being much darker, as oppose to the bright white walls reflecting off everything. the room is cold too, but that might just be due to the fact the academy’s heater never really worked, even when it was turning to winter time. 

zoe reaches for her phone on the nightstand, but instead, her hand touches a glass probably placed not too long ago. there’s water in it and some pills that she assumes are for her headache. zoe smiles, picking up the pills and swallowing them down with water. she sets the glass down and stretches, before going downstairs for breakfast.

there’s no one there, and zoe assumes nan and queenie had already eaten, fiona and cordelia hours before them. she sits down, spalding sets out a number of foods in front of her and she thinks how great it is to have someone doing things for you. she’d never experienced anything like it, zoe had to do everything by herself. 

she awkwardly dismisses spalding so she can eat. zoe picks up some pancakes and puts them on her plate, pouring syrup on them. it’s really good, better than any food she’d eaten at home, you know, when her mother actually  _ bothered _ to cook for her. thinking about her family gave zoe a gross feeling in her stomach, so she puts off the food for a while, instead drinking her orange juice. she’s just about to leave when she sees madison come down the stairs. somehow, she looks more tired than she did last night, in fact, she looks like she hadn’t slept at all. 

“hey.” zoe says. “did you sleep?” 

madison shrugs, her arms wrapping tightly around her slim figure. she walks past zoe slowly. “better cause you were by my side.” she smiles, or  _ attempts  _ to, because it didn’t look right, and it never does. 

zoe’s cheeks go pink but she tries to hide it by turning her head. her eyes fall to the ground, the slightly discolored white floor. she wonders how many times spalding has cleaned it before giving up and letting it be. brown eyes snap up as madison pulls a chair back, the noise echoing the empty dining hall. it’s just the two of them, like it always ends up to be. 

zoe turns to her, but she’s not even eating her food- _ all _ of the food that was laid out perfectly in front of her. she’s just kinda picking at it with her fork, like she never meant to actually eat it but acting as if she was.

it sparked some concern in zoe, cause she’d never actually  _ seen _ madison eat before, and if she did it was probably some small like a salad, and if she ate something larger, zoe would hear her puking her brains out in their shared bathroom later on. now, zoe never liked poking her nose in other people’s business, but given madison’s record and her...physical appearance, she really didn’t want anything happening to her.

“are you gonna eat?” zoe asks, and madison pushed away from the table.

“i’m not that hungry anyways.” she says, looking down, and for a second, zoe swore she saw a change in madison’s nature. 

zoe sighs, nudging her slightly so she’ll look at her. “look, i don’t wanna get all in your shit, but...i, i feel like you’re not...getting enough, uh,  _ nutrients _ in your body.” she says hesitantly. “i just don’t want anything bad to happen to you, madison.”

madison scoffs, turning the other way. “i’ve been through worse shit than starving myself.” 

“madison…” zoe replies in a firm tone. she doesn’t want her to act like it’s all just a big joke because it  _ isn’t _ , it’s fucking serious and obviously madison doesn’t feel like admitting it. 

the blonde throws her hands up in the air dramatically. “fine, fuck!” she exclaims. “yeah, i got problems, but it’s none of your fucking business, is it? tell delia and you’re dead.” she finishes, storming off upstairs. 

zoe stays in her seat for a few more minutes, clicking her tongue. as if one cue, cordelia walks into the dining hall, a shy smile. 

“did i miss something important?” the way she smiles...it made zoe want to crawl somewhere and hide. not to say cordelia was a bad person or anything, just her overuse of the gesture creeped the younger witch out a bit.

zoe sighs, looking down at her hands, examining her fingernails. “madison doesn’t want to listen to me, a-and i’m  _ trying _ to  _ help _ her but she just doesn’t care.” zoe mumbles as she reaches the end of her sentence. 

cordelia hums in response,  _ sighing _ in fact, zoe later realizes. “madison’s a...complicated person, i guess. i think, i think there might be something missing in her soul that unites her as truly human, i’ve known her for a while to know she definitely wouldn’t react the same way you would.”

“i-i  _ know _ , but-”

“no buts, miss benson,” cordelia cuts in. “if it’s something personal i’m sure she’s capable enough to handle it herself.”

“that’s the thing, i don’t think she is.”

cordelia doesn’t say anything for a while, she stares out the window, looking at cars passing by, people. it’s a nice day outside too, all bright and sunny. zoe follows her gaze, mind focusing on the pace of the cars. weirdly, she finds it relaxing. while she’s still looking outside, cordelia slowly exits, leaving zoe all alone in the dining hall. 

the brunette soon notices and does the same, heading upstairs.

* * *

zoe hadn’t seen madison all day, not even in the room. she thinks that maybe she’s avoiding her or something. zoe didn’t look too deep into it, but somewhere in the back of her head all possible outcomes clouded her mind and she couldn’t think straight for most of the day.

after dinner, zoe takes a warm bath to help clear her head. she sits in the tub and lets the water fill to the top. it’s boiling hot, there’s steam coming off of it, but zoe can’t even feel it anymore. she just...sits there. occasionally zoe dips her head back to wet her hair.

the loud knocking on the door startles zoe, and she sits up slightly. 

“zoe?” oh my god, she thought she’d never hear her voice again. “zoe, i’m sorry. please come out.”

zoe immediately get up and out of the tub, draining the water and fetching the first towel she saw, grabbing her clean clothes from the counter. 

fresh and changed, zoe goes into the bedroom, madison sitting on her bed facing away from her. 

“madison?” zoe asks, and it’s only then she realizes her shoulders heaving up and down. she’s crying. listening closely, she hears the sniffles, and she hears the short breaths. she hears everything that makes her human, completely disregarding what cordelia said earlier. 

zoe doesn’t know how to console her, she doesn’t even know if she  _ wants _ to be confronted. a small, light touch to her shoulder might just make it, so zoe does exactly that. madison averts her gaze, prideful, she didn’t want to cry in front of her. 

zoe cups her cheek, turning around to force madison to look at her. she eventually does, slowly. eyeliner and mascara are running down her cheeks, her eyes all puffy, but she still looks beautiful, she still looks beautiful like she always does. zoe wipes her tears away. 

“i’m sorry.” a small, soft whisper, completely and utterly unlike madison.

“madison, you put up a front of loving yourself, but i know that isn’t true.” zoe replies. 

madison’s wall goes up again, and all emotion she poured out to zoe just closes. “oh, boo hoo,” she’s back to her normal self. “who are you to tell me i fucking hate myself?” she yells. zoe’s taken aback, and she slightly steps away from the other girl. angrily, madison storms out the room, but zoe’s in no shape to just let her walk away like that. before she walks out the door, zoe slams her against the wall, hands being held down so she can’t hit her. zoe doesn’t know what she’s doing, or  _ what _ to do next. she does something she’d never expected to do, let alone with madison.

“ugh! wha-” 

she kisses her. soft, quick, stolen, but it’s still a kiss. with the height difference it’s awkward, but zoe works around that. she pulls back, ready for a slap, ready to be thrown against the wall, ready for anything now. 

but madison doesn’t do anything. she doesn’t hit her like zoe thought she would, or set her on fire. her pale hands linger on zoe’s forearms as she pulls her back down for another kiss. it’s less slow and more passionate now, but still soft. madison was always gentle.

they fall back on zoe’s bed, cause it’s closest to the door, with madison on top. her mouth trails down to zoe’s neck, kissing every spot of skin. zoe moans, hands tangled with blonde hair. madison whispers something into her neck, and zoe isn’t quite sure if she was meant to hear it or not. 

madison pulls away, ready to kiss at her mouth again, but zoe stops her before she does. her hand rests on the other girl’s cheek, thumb rubbing against it. her green eyes look tired, and zoe immediately sees the pain in them. she need something, desperately. zoe sits up and kisses her back, but not in the way madison does. zoe’s younger and had less experience, but she tries. she tries to make madison feel something that she’s been deprived of her whole life. 

slowly, she plants the kisses, one by one up to her jaw. while she kisses it zoe can feel the wetness from madison’s tears earlier on. madison’s still wearing her long sleeved shirt but zoe undoes the first buttons, exposing her collarbone. she moves to kiss the area, soon realizing there’s a smattering of thin white scars all across. as zoe’s fingers linger on the lines, her face shows concern. 

“did you do this?”

madison looks down, zoe lifts her head up. “y-yeah.” 

“madison, i-”

“n-no, please don’t say anything.” she pleads. “it’s nothing, don’t worry about them.” madison hopes zoe believes her enough to stop questioning it. zoe stares at her in disbelief, lifting up her sleeve. she doesn’t even feel like looking down, but madison does, and she swallows hardly.

“this one,” she points to a deep and sickly white line on her arm that looks like it has not quite healed yet. “i did when i came here. i remember it was too deep, i thought i was gonna pass out. cordelia found out though.” she tries so hard to keep her voice steady. “it was my first week and i was the only one here, by myself.”

zoe listens attentively, and she knows she’s the first person madison’s telling this to. she trusts her that much.

“sometimes i did it to to feel something.” madison whispers and it’s the softest and most vulnerable zoe’s ever seen her. “cause i can’t feel anything.”

zoe knows the next day she’ll act like none of this happened, that she’ll go back to her bitchy ways and be rude to her like she always does. zoe doesn’t understand her completely, but she knows enough and everything all makes sense. 

and one day, if she finds madison lying in the tub, lifeless, she’ll know that it’s not her fault.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im so upset and mad they killed zoe and queenie, they rlly deserved better ugh . have a shitty chapter sksksk also idk how long this is gonna be idk how to continue it lol


	3. chapter three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning - smut and madison has a choking kink sksSKSK and sorry if this has some mistakes I couldn't be bothered to proofread

the hot water burns her back, but zoe yearns for it. she enjoys the feeling of the scorching liquid seeping through every inch of her. painful but satisfying, the aftermath only brings her relief and at last, peace. she can only imagine what being burned at the steak feels like, the flames itching at her melting flesh, devouring her entirely. the only time she’s not ashamed to be a witch is when she finally dies like one. 

the bathroom door slams open, in which she can only guess it’s madison, whom she still had unrelieved tension with since last night. how was she supposed to address it? ‘oh, sorry i made out with you and discovered shit you weren’t ready to talk about?’ zoe sighs, face colliding with the white tiled wall. maybe she should acknowledge it, but only for madison’s sake, because she only regretted it  _ slightly _ , and zoe hopes madison thinks the same.

“hey sabrina.” madison’s voice echoes over the shower running, and it sounds like she’s back to her bitchy ways.

the water has gone cold but it feels nice against her raw body. she lingers there, letting the water fall over her cause it’s pure relief. she doesn’t reply to madison, she doesn’t feel like it. zoe stops the shower and reaches for her towel, pulling the curtains aside. madison’s by the sink, probably doing makeup. zoe walks right past her and into the bedroom. madison watches her leave through the mirror.

* * *

 

it’s dinner and madison doesn’t touch her food again, zoe shoots her a look but realizes she isn’t even looking at her, she’s occupied by her phone.

“are you gonna eat that?” queenie asks from across the table, her having already finished her food.

madison looks up, pushing the plate towards the other girl with the end of a fork as if she was allergic to it. “go ahead, but it’s not like you’ve had enough already.”

queenie’s hands slam on the table, echoing through the room. “i will fucking  _ eat  _ you!” she yells, picking up a knife and holding it to her own throat.

madison only shrugged, a slight grin on her face and no intimidation of the fact the other girl had the potential to kill her right now. “i’d like to see you try-”

“madison, just shut up! please.” zoe says, cutting in to avoid any deaths tonight. “and, queenie, just chill.” she follows on, letting nan take the knife away from her. it’s silent for a few seconds and everyone is staring at each other. it isn’t long before madison angrily huffs and storms off upstairs from being yelled at. queenie just sits cross armed in her chair, pissed.

“she started it.” queenie replies in annoyance. zoe sighs, getting up and running upstairs after madison. she opens the bedroom door, the blonde’s grumpily sitting on the end of her bed.

“madison,” zoe says, waiting for her to turn around. “madison, are you seriously upset that i yelled at you?”

madison’s sigh is long and dripping with irritation. “i could give less shits.” she stays facing the wall.

zoe sits down next to her, brushing the thin strands of blonde hair out her face. “is it about last night?” she whispers. “if you want to forget about it-”

“i  _ don’t _ .” madison whimpers, but it’s so quiet zoe could barely hear it. “you make me feel things, zoe, i’ve been trying to feel something for so long. i really fucking need you, a-and at this point, i don’t even  _ care _ if you don’t feel the same way, i....”

zoe grabs madison’s hand. she’s scared, her cold heart is going crazy and madison feels like dying. her world is so fucked up, it’s not even safe for them. they might have to do shit themselves, and maybe it’s not fair, maybe it isn’t at all, but that’s just how life is. in the end, they can only rely on each other before the weight of it all comes crashing down on them.

“you’re so broken.” zoe says, her words harsh but her voice gentle. “you’re a broken person. when i look in your eyes, there’s nothing there, not even a spark.”

madison tries looks away but zoe doesn’t let her. it’s true, it’s the fucking truth, and madison knows that. she knows she’s fucked up. all there is deep down, is a scared little child, begging for someone to save her. begging for a normal childhood, for normal parents to love her back, begging for a  _ normal life _ . where she wasn’t a witch and everything was just...normal. she’s desperate for it all...but, madison just accepts it. it’s who she is, and she can’t change that.

madison grabs zoe’s face, roughly kissing her. she needs this, and isn’t so sure zoe is okay with it until the other girl wraps her arms around her neck. madison lays her down on the bed, kissing her more slowly, more gently now. madison’s lips are soft and kind, allowing zoe to completely get lost every time. they move down to her jaw, then to her neck, a little nibble causes zoe to moan slightly.

madison kisses her mouth again, biting zoe’s bottom lip,  _ dragging _ it across her own. zoe catches madison off guard and slides her tongue in her mouth freely, smirking at her shock.

“is that how you wanna play?” madison asks, voice laced with desire. she’s straddling zoe, and her cold hands explore the soft skin of her stomach under her shirt. madison’s nails, almost lovingly, grazes the area of her hip bones, unbuttoning the other girl’s shirt at the same time. her hand rests on zoe’s exposed stomach, and she shivers at madison’s cold touch.

“madison..” zoe breathes out from underneath her.

“i can stop if you want, babygirl..” madison says, slowing down her actions. she really didn’t want to push zoe into this, and was only going to continue if the other girl was fine with it.

“i’m okay.” zoe replies, tugging the hem of madison’s shirt. she took it off and threw it on the ground, they were both even now, only in their bras and undergarments. the blonde’s hand slipped under the fabric of zoe’s skirt.

“are you a virgin?” madison mumbles. zoe shakes her head and madison’s hand goes further and further until she stops suddenly.

confused, zoe sits up slightly. “what’s wrong?” she asks.

“no, no, i just…” madison doesn’t even finish her sentence. her hair is messy and so is her makeup, but she looks  _ so fucking beautiful _ . more than ever. her tired eyes have a spark in them and she’s actually smiling, she’s genuinely happy. zoe smiles back, in which madison hungrily and possessively kisses her. she finally slips two fingers inside zoe, pumping slowly but rhythmically. the other girl moans, her nails scratching madison’s back, leaving red marks when she adds another finger in.

“s-shit, madison..” zoe breathes heavily in her ear.

“you’re so fucking wet for me.” madison smirks, biting her neck and thrusting her fingers in faster. “i love it.”

zoe replies in a strangled moan. her mind is blank, but her core is pooling with heat, and she loves the feeling of madison’s long fingers in her, hitting every soft spot just right. zoe hides her face in madison’s shoulder, because she’s kinda embarrassed to moan even more. instead they come out repressed or muffled.  

zoe’s climax reaches, her walls clench around madison’s fingers and she whimpers as she comes. madison pulls out, the sticky white fluid dripping down her fingers.

“damn, i’m starving.” she says, licking it. zoe pants, trying to pull herself together as she sits up.

“i thought you weren’t hungry..”

madison chuckles, wiping the remaining liquid on the bed sheets. “not for food.”

zoe’s cheeks turn pink and she wipes away the sweat building up on her forehead. she softly kisses the other girl.

“are you okay?” madison asks, her hot breath on her lips driving her crazy. zoe nods, hands gently caressing her back. madison hisses, a burning feeling building up from behind her. “fuck, what did you do to my back? it hurts like shit..”

zoe smiles nervously. “sorry.”

“is it bleeding?”

“no, no,” zoe laughs. “it’s just red.”

madison unclips zoe’s bra with one hand, kissing her collarbone area as the other girl gasps. “yeah, yeah, i’ll get my revenge someday.”

in an instant, zoe pushes madison to the bed so she’s on top and their positions are reversed. zoe’s bra is just barely hanging on with one strap, but madison, so hungrily, rips it off and throws it to the other side of the room.

“i-i’ve never done this before, actually..” zoe speaks up, suddenly feeling nervous as her ‘in the moment’ persona fades away.

madison unbuttons her jeans and pulls them down, revealing a black lacy underwear that succeeds in hiding absolutely nothing. she takes zoe’s hand hand and guides it up her leg, the other girl blushing intensely as her fingers slip into madison’s hot folds.

she’s quieter than zoe could have expected,  all soft pants and whimpers and pleading with zoe not to stop,  _ fuck, princess. just like that~ _

however, her hand is at an awkward angle and her wrist cramps quickly, causing her movements to grow slow and clumsy. zoe stops for a second to relieve the pain, then continues. madison grabs zoe’s other hand, wherever the fuck it is, and holds it to her neck.

“choke m-me, please.”

“w-what?” zoe’s eyebrows are knotted in confusion, although her fingers don’t stop. “like,  _ choke _ choke?”

tears prick at the sides of madison’s eyes, but her lips are twisted in a slight grin. “y-yeah.” she moans.

zoe’s hand hesitantly wraps around madison’s throat, gripping it, but not tight enough to actually hurt her. “is this okay?”

madison nods and licks her lips. she pants when zoe fingers her faster.

“oh my god, you’re such a kinky bitch.” she chuckles, pumping quickly.

it doesn't take long for madison to come; a shuddered, strangled cry. when zoe removes her fingers, madison twitches; she laughs breathlessly. "ah, shitt.."

madison feels something, and not just the pleasure pumping through her body. she can sense it  _ with _ zoe,  _ knowing  _ the other girl feels the same way. the empty void is no longer there and what she’s been lacking for so long has finally been restored to her.

she feels truly loved, maybe for the very first time.

zoe lies down on madison’s chest, twirling over  every scar and thin white line on her collarbone. madison uses her telekinesis to open up her nightstand and send a cigarette pack flying her  way from across the room.

she puts one in her mouth, lighting it up with the sheer power of pyrokinesis. “want one?” she asks the girl next to her.

“didn’t cordelia say not to smoke inside?”

“well, delia can suck my ass.” she says, puffing out the smoke towards the ceiling. “not literally cause, uh, pedophilia.”

zoe giggles, hiding her face in madison’s neck. “i’m sorry about your back.”

“it’s fine,” madison exhales. “makes a cool scar to show people that you’re mine.” she says, slowly lowering the blunt and turning towards zoe. “you  _ are _ mine.. right?”

zoe only brushes her hair out of her eyes, eyeliner smudged and running, looking like she just came out of some avril lavigne concert. “what makes you doubt it?”

madison shrugs, ditching the cigarette. “i  _ know _ i’m not the nicest person in the world. i-i feel like maybe you’d rather have someone else.” she murmurs.

“and you say this after i had sex with you and, you know,  _ choked you?” _

madison smiles, looking down. her lips come to a close eventually, and she’s still scared. still the scared little girl running away from her problems. but right now, she didn’t feel like running. or walking, actually. maybe not getting up at all. madison feels safer with zoe, but maybe she’d feel better buried and dead underground, having people walk all over her like they did when she was alive.

madison softly kisses her lips, pulling the covers over them both. zoe can feel her heartbeat, as she holds her tight and close, safe and protected.

“you’re the only light in my life. i need you.” madison whimpers, and zoe wipes her tears away. she’s all kinds of fucked up, and zoe’s secluded from this earth, too good for it that she feels the need to hide.

and so for two people so isolated from the world, albeit in such very different ways, it must’ve been a miracle. they  _ needed _ the friendship they gave each other before one of them slips away.  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this was hard to write but thats the end! hope u enjoyed sum angsty zadison idk what to write next lol


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